Prefer to listen with your ears instead of your eyes? Done.
Have you ever spent an entire weekend binge-watching Arrested Development on Netflix?
Well, the truth is I haven’t been able to hear the word ‘fallacy’ the same ever since I heard it in this scene a few months ago:
(And if you haven’t watched the show—well, I can’t recommend it highly enough if you like clever, irreverent humor. Trust me, this clip doesn’t even begin to do it justice. Thanks to James Altucher for the recommendation.)
Now, if you’re not a fan, I’ll break down the above scene really briefly.
The girl in the blue dress has just found out she was adopted.
And the man in the bowtie is her closeted gay husband.
She's realizing she isn't who she thought she was. And he's in as much denial as ever about who HE is.
(In fact, the word 'fallacy' in this clip has a double meaning. Hint, hint, wink, wink.)
Yup, that about sums up this particular scene.
There’s WAY more to the show of course—but the reason I’m sharing this particular scene is because it made me think of something we all struggle with at some point in our businesses.
(And often in our lives, too.)
It’s the struggle to show up with 100% authenticity.
I know the word ‘authenticity’ gets overused, but what I mean by it here is. . .
The ability to have, be, and do exactly what YOU want in your business (and life).
(Instead of what some expert—or guru, or coach, or whatever—says you should want.)
In the show Arrested Development, it’s a running theme that Tobias Funke (the bowtied character in the above clip) is in total denial of his sexuality even though EVERYONE around him knows he’s gay.
(Including his wife.)
And today I'm wondering. . .
Is there any possibility that you’re in denial of something in YOUR life?
(And no, I’m NOT broaching the sexuality issue here. . . other blogs do a much better job of that than I ever could).
But is there somewhere, specifically in your business, where you’re denying what you really want?
Even though Tobias Funke is a hilarious character on the show. . .
In real life, it’s not too hilarious when you’re living a fallacy.
In fact, it can keep you stuck and broke, and quite miserable for a long time.
So where might you be doing one thing in your business and thinking and feeling another?
Is it in your:
- Business model?
- Sales process?
Let’s break ‘em down a bit so you can see what I mean.
Are you shuffling customers through a ‘funnel’ when you’d really like to be interacting with them in a more personal way?
Were you encouraged by some coach to create a series of products, packages, or programs to meet income goals. . . but your offerings don’t really feel like YOU?
Are you leaking money because you have NO business model, when what you really need is a swift kick in the pants (maybe even from yourself) and a plan that’s inked—even if it’s only scrawled on a soggy napkin over drinks and appetizers with a good business buddy?
Is your copy written in your own voice, or that of your favorite guru (or perhaps the copywriter you hired)?
Is your message spot-on in relation to your values, your vision, and the people you most want to serve? (Or have you even clarified these things?)
Is your marketing plan in alignment with your talents, preferences, and your business's current stage (e.g. video vs. blogs, Twitter vs. Instagram, SEO vs. ads), or is it just a copy-and-paste from that coach whose seminar you attended at the end of last year?
Do you feel pushy and unnatural when you’re trying to make sales because you’re using a ‘formula’ from someone (who may or may not be more of a ‘natural salesperson’)?
Do you HAVE a sales process?
Are you tearing your hair out because you keep having conversations with potential customers but you can never quite seem to make the sale because you’re using the wrong ‘script’ to ask for it?
Is your website a lovely representation of. . . someone else’s lovely website?
Do you have any idea how to approach your communications at each touchpoint of customer interaction. . . or are your communications a hodge-podge of things you’ve sorta kinda copied from others who seem successful?
Is who YOU really are leaping off the page (virtual or otherwise) loud and clear?
Are you just taking whoever comes along with respect to business contacts without deciding whether you have anything in common with them?
Are you in total integrity with your values when approaching business partners (i.e. you’re not just approaching them because you want to use them to grow your audience but rather because you genuinely RESPECT them)?
Along that same vein, are you simply 'hanging out' (virtually or otherwise) with people you LIKE on a regular basis, rather than people who make your face crinkle up in disgust when you see what they’re up to on Facebook or read their insincere emails?
These aren’t necessarily easy questions to ask yourself.
I know I’ve asked them of myself many times over the years. . .
And sometimes I’m not so crazy about the answers I get back from my own inner wisdom.
Because sometimes it means I have to cut the cord with someone. . .
Or change everything AGAIN on my [whatever] page on my website. . .
Or it means I have to turn away from a project I’d already dived into. . .
And start ALL OVER AGAIN.
But you know what?
Every single time I’ve had to do that. . .
Every. Single. Time.
Something wonderful has happened as a result.
Every time I've cut off an unhealthy, inauthentic connection. . .
A new, healthy, and much more beneficial (in all ways) connection has come along.
Every time I’ve had to rethink my messaging. . .
A new slew of people have arrived into my life just waiting to hear more of my REAL message.
And every time I’ve been brave enough to tweak my business model so it doesn’t make me bat-shit crazy. . .
(Sorry, there was really no other way to say that. . .)
I’ve found that the work I do just gets more and more rewarding and fun.
So today, a challenge:
Find ONE area of your business (or your life) that feels to you like a fallacy, and make a plan to change it as soon as possible.
Keep in mind, I’m not accusing you here.
Maybe there are no fallacies in your life and biz.
But chances are good (‘cause you’re human) there are.
And even if there aren’t, it won’t hurt to take a look, will it?
You just might find yourself coming out of the closet. ;)
And if you’re brave enough to share the fallacy(ies) you’ve identified, please do! I'd love to hear about it in the comments below.
Not only what you’ve discovered, but what you’re going to do about it.
See you next time. . . ;)